Listen, I cannot follow through with anything from start to finish. Are there people like that out there? I’m usually so frigging pumped about something that’s just absolutely great in my head, then I give myself 23635 cool ways to execute whatever it is. I even pat myself on the back when I imagine how awesome the outcome would be! Fast forward to the day I’m actually supposed to start whatever, the following emojis sum up my mood nicely :😴😩😒😵🙄.
Needless to say I procrastinate till thy kingdom come…or till the next great idea pops up 😂. I’ve been thinking a lot the past two days and I have decided NOT to continue like this. I can’t… I’m a mom now and I need to make a conscious effort to be better. It also hit me yesterday, when I was having an unusually rough day, that I honestly don’t do much for God. I cried unto him because I felt like my life was falling apart. Then I asked him “My father, why don’t you answer me?” He did. He answered me so fast I wondered what he had been doing for the past 6 months 😐.
He sent me a sign that enabled peace to settle over me. (I’ll share details of this testimony when the time is right) As the peace settled over me, with it came the realization that God sees my struggle every day, he sees my tears, he wants to help me but he can’t because:
- I pray with doubt in my heart. I pray for God to fix my situation, then I start making a plan B on the side ” just in case”🤦🏾♀️. We are all guilty of that! But if we can fix the problem by ourselves then what do we need God for? Why are we bothering to pray?
- I am not consistent with my service to God. I am not consistent with prayers, fasting and even my daily devotional! Like I said I’m pumped for one maybe two weeks with the spirit, then after a while I just carry on with my life..especially when I haven’t received the answers I want. Or even when there’s the slightest sign that it’s going to get better.
This leads me to make so many mistakes that end up costing me! 2 Corinthians 5:10 was quoted in my devotional last night. It basically stressed on how each one of us would give account of our actions on earth to our heavenly father on judgement day. Do you ever wonder why, if God has forgiven and forgotten all of our sins, then what do we really have left to account for? If he says he has forgiven us then why is he coming to judge us? 🤔 I found out that we are going to explain to God what we did with our time here on earth not necessarily our bad actions! We are going to explain what we did with the talents he gave us; How we fulfilled our purpose here on earth. Wasting our lives on anything other than God is evil doing of a different kind! Those who did nothing for Christ and sunk into “good for nothingness” basically wasted time and energy and precious life given… We all know where they’ll end up.
So I digress, I think we should all do strive to be better at following through with tasks we set for ourselves and hold ourselves accountable for the things we do to glorify the Lord on earth. I think following through with our plans and objectives both in and out of church will draw us closer to finding what he sent us here to do. On that note my close friends and I have decided to do a 21 day fast with the goal of cleansing our bodies and spirits so we may draw closer to God. Obviously after everything I’ve said, I have to go through with it. To prove to myself and my heavenly father that I want to be better. That I am serious about getting closer to him and fulfilling my purpose on earth. So this is day 1 guys!